Breastfeeding & Mr. Fat Cock
Friday, Dec. 31, 2004
2:16 p.m.
I always compose great entries in my head while lying in bed or driving in the car or lathering up in the shower. Never while I'm actually sitting down at the computer, ready to type. Let's see if I can reconstruct one.
When I was 14, I was still a virgin and knew very little about boys. But my body was telling me something different. Ever since I had hit puberty (at about 10 or 11), I was a horny and confused kid. Oh, and horny. So, I would constantly daydream about having my body touched and touching someone else and having sex and all that good stuff. It was such a strong desire; it's amazing what our bodies can do to us.
Now I have an equally intense desire to breastfeed. Of course it's Mother Nature and hormones and propagation of the species and all that good stuff. But I want it sooooo badly!!! I daydream about it. I imagine Falcon at my breast. Sometimes it's too overwhelming! I just want him here!!! It's especially potent when I first wake up in the morning and I lie in bed, slowly waking up.
Here's something else:
Almost three years ago, I had a short little affair with a married man with whom I used to work. Let's call him Mr. Fat Cock, so that Nikki will know exactly who I'm talking about. I had had the hots for him for at least 2 years and I thought he was great and cool and interesting. Now I still think he's cool, but nowhere near as much. So, anyway, he really could not stand Stupid Trainer. They worked in Customer Service together about 4 years ago. Mr. Fat Cock was like, "Stupid Trainer always yells at the callers and hangs up on them and asks to speak to their managers, etc. I don't know who decided SHE should work in Customer Service." I heard the SAME EXACT story from at least 5 other people at work. Well, yesterday, I brought up Mr. Fat Cock in Stupid Trainer's earshot. She went off!!! She was like, "He was horrible in Customer Service! He always used to yell at the callers." Are you fucking kidding me?!?!?!?!?! And then she said that they used to hang out together. What?!?!?!?! There's no way in hell he would ever hang out with her! Just because you accosted him with your life story while he was trying to smoke a cigarette (trust me, she used to do that...she caught me several times before I learned how to avoid her) does NOT mean that you used to hang out! Oh, and when he first worked there, we had a huge overtime project that almost everyone in the office participated in. I think I only worked about 5-10 extra hours per week on it, but I think he worked about 20-25 extra hours per week and was the employee who spent the most time on it. So when he received his bonus check, he was like, "Look how much money I made", which really means, "Hey, you lazy assholes, if you were willing to work, you could make a buttload of cash, too". Well, Stupid Trainer took it as, "Look how much my salary is and I'm better than you, etc." Stupid Trainer was also mad that 4 years ago, he made more money than her, even though she had worked for the company longer. Um, he had 10 years of experience in the industry?!?!?! You worked in a fucking wallpaper store!!! Get it, fuckhead?!?!?!?! See? This is her weird, fucked-up mind. She twists everything around! It's almost impossible to communicate with her, since she misconstrues everything. Or else she's too busy kissing my ass (which is really annoying!).
I just pulled a load of books off the bookshelf & I'm going to try to sell them on e-Bay. Yeah, let's see how it goes.
Miss One?
Moving On - Wednesday, Sept. 05, 2007
I remembered my password - Friday, Jul. 20, 2007
I need someone - Thursday, Apr. 20, 2006
I miss him - Tuesday, Apr. 18, 2006
Possibly the worst weekend of my life? - Sunday, Apr. 16, 2006
