SHE'S. JUST. THAT. STUPID.
Thursday, Apr. 17, 2003
7:25 p.m.
9:00AM
I have my mom & my step-mom, Holly. Holly has known me since I was 2 or 3 and has been my step-mother since I was 4. Even though she didn't give birth to me, I still consider her one of my mothers (the same way I consider my step-father one of my fathers). She instilled her values in me the same way my own mother did. She disciplined me as she saw fit and I love, adore, respect, and look up to her now (and really, always have). Yes, a lot of the time, she got to do fun stuff with us. But sometimes she had to get down & dirty...tell us to clean up, put crabby kids to bed, spank my sister when she was being a fucking brat (and she was, trust me). She parented me as much as any of my other parents. She is my model on what a step-mother is and should be. So this is where I'm coming from with regards to Star.
I'm her 2nd mother. I only hope she loves and respects me as much as I do Holly. But that's beside the point. Here's the point:
What do you do when you think the child's mother does not provide enough boundaries for her? I think Evil Misty lets Star get away with everything. And it's turning her into a brat! Children need boundaries to be set by their parents!!! They can't set the boundaries themselves! They need and want boundaries! From Star's behavior with us sometimes, I can tell there is not consistency between her father and her mother, with regards to discipline. She tries to get away with stuff that Greg and I would never tolerate...and that, apparently, her mother does. It's so tough! I wish her mother would provide boundaries for her, emotionally and physically. I often feel like all Greg and I do with our time is try to undo all the dumb shit her mother does. It's so frustrating, because we could be using the time to enjoy her and love her, etc. But we have to constantly discipline her about the same stuff! It's so annoying and often boring! And all 3 of us end up feeling very negative. If Evil Misty would just get on the same page as us, then it would be easier for everyone involved.
Greg's and my kids will be pretty well-behaved because we're not going to put up with some of this crap. They'll know what we expect of them & they'll live up to our expectations. Maybe that's what the problem is. Evil Misty only expects Star to be a brat, so Star lives up to it. Greg expects her to be nice to others, to be gentle with people (physically...that kid has the strongest grip!), to go to sleep by herself, to go pee by herself, to use an indoor voice when indoors, to allow other people to have their space and privacy, to clean up her toys, to feed herself, to throw trash away, to keep her socks & shoes on (trust me, this is a tough one & I don't blame her for hating socks & shoes), to get dressed by herself (besides buttoning, zipping, & tying), to let the animals have their space to play & run around, to not go up or down the stairs without telling an adult first, to hold a hand while anywhere near the street, to hold a hand in public period (I don't think Evil Misty does this, because she's often so resistant & tries to be sneaky & get away), to keep her car seat buckled (again, I don't think Evil Misty pays attention, because Star thinks it's hilarious if she weasels out of her seat, even though Greg has yelled at her twice now), etc. And Star knows what is expected of her at Daddy's, so she tries really hard to live up to those expectations. I think she gets confused from time to time, thinks she's at Mommy's house, because she pulls some bullshit stunt & then gets this "Oh, whoops, wrong house!" look on her face!
OK...just me venting about how spoiled Evil Misty is making Star. Maybe Evil Misty just doesn't know how, since she's a spoiled brat herself. She expects everyone to take care of her...first it was her mom, then Greg, now her mom again, and Greg's friend, Tom. Oh, yeah, and Evil Misty's older boyfriend (looking for a father figure much?). She can't hold down a job longer than a couple of months, she drives Tom's car now, her mom pays all of her bills. It's just gross. I don't want Star to grow up to be like her mother! Her mother is, in my opinion, not a great addition to the human race. In fact, she's a drain on the rest of us. Maybe Evil Misty is JUST. THAT. STUPID. Yes, I think so. Nikki said that recently & I think it fits.
SHE'S. JUST. THAT. STUPID.
4:00 PM
I have spent most of the day researching government links to write a new procedure on immunizations. I can't believe the manufacturer stopped making Lymerix last year! WTF?!?!?! And I've been educating myself as to all the symptoms of childhood illnesses that can be prevented by vaccinations. Turns out Rubella (AKA German measles) is really not a very horrible illness. But I guess if folks wanted to toss it in with the MMR vaccine, hey, more power to them.
I have to stop at the store on the way home to get Kathy's cake. But by the time I post this, I will have already gone to the store! Yaaaaay!
We didn't get Star last night because her Passover dinner didn't finish until late (I could have told Greg that, but I don't think he & Evil Misty communicate very well...kind of like him & me!). He just didn't hold her to a time and he accepted her answer to when she would bring Star over as "after dinner". He thought that meant 7:30, whereas I assumed it was 10:00 (waaaaay past her bedtime). He told me he's never had any trouble communicating with anyone before he met me. But that doesn't seem very true, by watching his interaction with Evil Misty. I'm think I'm just the first person to call him on it. Maybe I'm the first person stupid or brazen or "devil may care" enough to think that I'm always right and fuck what he thinks. Well, I am, but that beside the point!
7:25 PM
Now Star is here and all is well. I bought a Black Forest cake for Kathy's birthday & a card & a pack of candles. Then, since cards & baby stuff are in the same aisle, I also got 2 really cool sippy cups for Star and some baby body wash.
Miss One?
Moving On - Wednesday, Sept. 05, 2007
I remembered my password - Friday, Jul. 20, 2007
I need someone - Thursday, Apr. 20, 2006
I miss him - Tuesday, Apr. 18, 2006
Possibly the worst weekend of my life? - Sunday, Apr. 16, 2006
