Optimist
Tuesday, May. 24, 2005
8:36 p.m.
I must be some loopy fucking optimist! Or a total fool. Same thing, right? I want this marriage to work. I don't want my son to have 2 houses while he grows up. I had that and, sure, it's not the worst thing in the world, but it's not that great either. I want him to have a dad who worked through the troubles. I want him to have parents who love and support each other. Yep...I'm a hippie peace-loving freak.
So, anyway, after discussion last night, here's what he has agreed to do:
1. Go to counseling for his substance abuse and related depression.
2. Go on medication for the depression.
3. Go to NA meetings (in fact, he's at one now).
4. Pay back all of the money to me. His boss (also an addict) has loaned him $600 of it, which was deposited directly into my checking account this morning.
What I have agreed to do:
1. Find NA meetings for him, whenever he needs one.
2. Find a therapist. Our EAP benefits have come in handy on this one! Schdule the initial appointment.
3. Change the PIN on my bank card.
4. Leave him if he does this again.
And, of course, love him. I'm a total sap...I want to believe in the good in him. I want, at our 50-year anniversary, to be the wife who stuck through the tough second year.
I also know that we need to get out of Baltimore ASAP. This place has such bad energy. I've heard it from Matt, from Nikki, from Stacy. Bad bad bad. We need to go!
Miss One?
Moving On - Wednesday, Sept. 05, 2007
I remembered my password - Friday, Jul. 20, 2007
I need someone - Thursday, Apr. 20, 2006
I miss him - Tuesday, Apr. 18, 2006
Possibly the worst weekend of my life? - Sunday, Apr. 16, 2006
